On Manning Up and Being A Girl

Very interesting: would love to hear your thoughts on either. (Thanks to Cat and Rachel for links)

 

14 thoughts on “On Manning Up and Being A Girl

  1. I love the second one – haven’t seen the first yet as am at work.

    See, I wonder if we get this wrong in consertive circles. I am NOT a complimentarian of any shade, but (correct me if i’m wrong) – the idea is that both sexes are of equal worth but created for different roles, right? The thing that scares me is how much the role of a women has been sidelined, relegated and ignored. And this advert shows me girls being strong, acheiving. Wgatever role they’re in, they can do that – there is NOTHING to be ashamed of in being a strong, confident girl.

    Sorry, bt of a hobby horse!

  2. It’s interesting that we’re going back to the be who you are things. Be who we are, are people who are loved and made in the image of God. How hard is that to remember when we’re told that we’re useless?

    And as a Christian man I especially feel my failure to man up, particularly in the light of Ephesians. And I think we have been struggling to have good male role models in mine (30ish), and younger generations. I think we need to tell boys how to man up, but not just tell, show it too. And I guess it’s similar to the video, we need to let them know that to be a man we can cry, but we also need to care and love sacrificially! I know that I fail as a man, I know I fail my wife and children in that regard. I think we need to have more men teaching and showing younger men what it means to love sacrificially, to not exasperate children.

    Sorry, I went a bit rambly there, saying things that we all know.

  3. yes, I think whatever your view on gender roles etc, we’ve got to have room for different kinds of men and different kinds of women within them.

  4. I have just started reading “Good: The Joy of Christian Manhood and Womanhood” – a free ebook released by Desiring God and it seems to deal with a couple of these issues really well – might be worth a read :)

  5. Good points Matt. And what you say about male role models is very interesting: the closest I can think of (outside family/church) are magazines like ‘Men’s Health etc’ or celebrities/presenters like Beckham.
    Also agree we need to model what it means to be male/female: and in positive, achievable ways that focus on internals more than externals. Hard to teach it when I’m still learning myself!

  6. Amazing videos! WOW!
    I just read a devotional today with similar issues, very nice too!

  7. Thanks Emma. I like them both. When “manning up” is seen as a good thing and being “like a girl” is a bad thing that is surely indicative of the fact that our society is still laden with inherent sexism in its views about what it means to be male or female.

    I would love it if we could use a little bit more imagination about what being a man or being a girl should look like. When we have a rigid and restrictive view of masculinity/femininity the impact on those who don’t fit the mould concerns me. For me, growing up as a boy who didn’t fit the male stereotype led to a lot of shame, and I guess I still feel that to an extent now, as a man who has no interest in almost anything “manly” like sport, DIY, cars etc. And whilst this is a societal issue, rather than just a church problem, I don’t think the church helps much. Particularly when a macho version of Christianity is pushed by the likes of Mark Driscoll – who says things like this:
    “Latte-sipping Cabriolet drivers do not represent biblical masculinity, because real men — like Jesus, Paul, and John the Baptist — are dudes: heterosexual, win-a-fight, punch-you-in-the-nose dudes. In other words, because Jesus is not a limp-wristed, dress-wearing hippie, the men created in his image are not sissified church boys; they are aggressive, assertive, and nonverbal.”

    That doesn’t exactly help with my shame or make me feel welcome. Of course, I am in danger of going in completely the opposite direction and saying that Jesus spoke tenderly, wept, showed mercy, described himself as a hen wanting to gather up her chicks under her wings etc. But trying to make Jesus fit our own mould is probably fairly silly. In reality, Jesus had a lot of time for people who were very different to him, especially people who didn’t live up to cultural expectations.

    Thanks for your blog Emma, always a good read.

  8. Thought provoking stuff. My observation of working in English context with young men is that it is different to the American context. America has the strong narrative of you gotta make ‘the team’ and throw a ball around in the back yard with your Dad. The church has pushed a much stronger male image of being a man. In this country, on the other hand, we have a heavily feminised church and culture. The boys are told through media that a mature and in touch personality is one that is more feminine and hence the approachable friendly guys are the ones like Will from Will and Grace (or hundreds of other examples along those lines). I think I would want to say different things in those different contexts. In the American style context I would want to say watch video one above and in the English context I would often want to say- man up!- be strong like Christ was, confront issues, fight for what is right, lead in your home and don’t want to be a little boy all your life playing computer games in your bedroom.

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