“This is what I do for you”

i dont like you mummy

Here’s a lovely guest post from Caroline…

Every once in a while our whole family has to be somewhere early in the morning, all together. On these occasions, I find it is easier to dress the little ones in clean clothes BEFORE they go to sleep, leaving their shoes and socks beside their beds. In the wee hours I go in, uncover them, put on their socks and shoes, walk them to the toilet, load them in the car, and give them their breakfast on the way.

When I pull down their blankets, they curl up, trying to keep themselves warm. They resist and question. I explain and continue to get them ready. They squirm and make it difficult, but it is still better than having them do it alone. As they get older, they cooperate more and will even help with the younger ones. They come to trust that where we are going is good, and in the end they will be glad to have been part of it.

One very early morning as I was tying up a particularly stubborn shoe, a thought ran through my mind: “This is what I do for you” and as the little brown shoe kept pulling away back up to the curled body: “This is what you do to me”. Now, I’m not saying I heard an audible voice. I really hate when people tell me God told them something when it is totally wacky and contrary to what he has already told them (scripture) so I try to be careful saying God said this and God said that.

Having said that, this is what I see in my mind:

I am in bed and it is still dark outside. I feel a draft on my body and I pull up into a fetal position to warm and protect myself. Someone has hold of my foot and is putting on my shoe. It is Jesus. “Come on, we’re going.” He says. “Where?” I ask. “I’ll explain later” He says. “Oh. I can’t go right now, I …um…don’t have my purse” says I. “You don’t need your purse”, says Jesus, “I have cash, and you’re not driving.”

We get in the car and I start complaining, “Did you bring snacks?” and “Where are we going? How long will this take?” Sure enough, He drives, pays for everything, and in the end I am glad to have gone along. Another early morning , He is there at the foot of the bed getting me ready. Despite my past experience I start with the objections: “Thanks for asking Lord, I know you’ll drive and pay, but I think I can’t go this time. I need to, you know, fix my hair, put on some make up, I’m kind of a mess.” “No time”, says Jesus, “besides, where we’re going, no one will be looking at you.”

All this to say: His ways are not our ways. He leads and provides because it’s all his. We can follow Him even when it’s dark and cold and scary outside because He knows where he’s going. Some trips are short, some are long and some last a lifetime, but we are never left with only our own inadequate resources.

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