Deadly Independence

needyIt’s easier to be a helper than the one who asks for help.

Being needed feels good: strong and safe and solid.    I Do Things.  I’m Useful and Necessary. I have a place in the world and when I look in the mirror, I like what I see.  I choose to be here. I’m a Producer.

Neediness feels very different: precarious and shameful – like baring your throat to a stranger. No mirrors and no lights – just fear and dependence.  I’m a Drain.  A consumer.  Useless and unnecessary.

It feels wrong to have needs.  Wrong to rely on others.  Wrong to admit it: you’re weak and you can’t stand alone.

And then I look at Jesus…

The eternal Word of God who became a speechless baby.

The One who walks on water, learning how to crawl.

The Lord who can turn water into wine, growing hungry and weak.

The Ruler of heaven – praying, on His knees.

The Judge of all sitting silently in the dock.

The Author of Life, choking on a cross, and committing His Spirit to God.

Jesus said “‘Very truly I tell you, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does… By myself I can do nothing; I judge only as I hear, and my judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me.” (John 5:19, 30)

Where did we get the idea that independence was a virtue?

Not from the One who rests in His Father’s love and relies constantly on the indwelling of His Spirit.

Not from the Trinity: The Father, Son and Spirit  upholding each other.

We need food and drink. We need shelter and rest. We need guidance and help. We need other people. Most of all, we need Jesus.

Don’t despise your dependence.  It might just be your greatest need.



5 thoughts on “Deadly Independence

  1. hi there man was not meant to live alone. I do believe that this applies to woman too. I have an amazing mother and father who help me. I am very reluctant to ask them for help because my mum has a bad back and my dad is finally recovering from m.e. (thank you Jesus).

    I have a family of amazing neighbours who help me in so many ways that i feel like im their 5th daughter. They are not christians. i need to talk to them about Jesus. They are so good to me its amazing. I feel like i owe them about “100” thankyou cards. But they dont want that. They show their love for me. Jesus is in authority over everything – and he wanted me to meet this family. But i have not done my full duty to God in sharing the Gospel. Please pray for me for an opportunity to share with them xx kath

  2. “Where did we get the idea that independence was a virtue?” I’m thinking. the third chapter of Genesis…
    He was very crafty and he still is. : )

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