Every year my mum gets me a magazine subscription. I try and weed out the body fascists and celebrity dribble. This leaves me with Conde Nast Traveller, The People’s Friend, Angler’s Monthly or something featuring ‘Real Women’. The current edition has recipes (featuring ‘store-cupboard basics’ like pomegranate seeds, black molasses and quinoa), life-affirming stories, (usually someone starting a cupcake business), Royal Baby News, a craft section (always involves spray-painting leaves) and a pull-out, which this month is: 101 uses for bicarbonate of soda.
If I were designing my own magazine, I’d want:
no babies, royal or otherwise.
101 ways with mouldy cheese. (guaranteed store-cupboard basic).
Why Baggy Pants Rock His World
Real-life cupcake disasters (with photos)
‘I’m Actually A Hologram’ by Angelina Jolie
Fashion Focus: Tracksuits
Less Sex Now! (Why Too Much Nooky Can Send You Blind)
True Life Story: I Was Expected To Come Second: And I Did
What have I missed?