Out of Order

What makes you anxious?  And how do you deal with it?  Here’s a few of my own personal cisterns…

Not having enough. Solution: binge-eating, stock-piling groceries, buying new clothes that are exactly the same as the old ones, plotting and planning.

Having too much. Solution: giving everything away, clearing out (and binning) perfectly good crockery, books, clothes.  Refusing to open things that people have bought me (they’re too good, so I should save them for some imaginary future day), trying to do good stuff to ‘earn’ a haircut. Buying affection.

Mess.  Otherwise known as ‘feelings’. Solution: starve them, stuff them, drown them, ignore them. Also: cleaning. Feeling out of control? Line up your CDs.  Not sure how to deal with your anger?  Scrub the floor instead.

Uncertainty.  Solution: make your life as small as possible.  Don’t take risks.  Only commit to situations and circumstances that you can control.

Sickness: Solution: pretend it’s not there.  Deny it  – or give it complete control.  Lie down under it.  Make it your identity.


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